Heartaches: How to Ease the Pain when it comes & Avoid the Attack on your Heart

Hi Everyone! I know this is a long time from Valentine’s Day but I wanted to reach out about how delicate the human heart is.

I had cousins, they were a happily married couple. Long time into the marriage, they had a son and adopted another son. By the time I came along in the family, they had been married for at least twenty years. One day the wife died suddenly from an illness she was not aware of. The husband became so saddened by the loss of his beloved wife, he grew ill. A month after losing the love of his life, he left this side of living to be with her.

I’ve heard, any time our heart breaks, it too can happen literally. We have heartstrings so sensitive to our feelings, any time we are crushed enough, a heart-string pops and disconnects from the body and heart.

There is a disease called the Broken Heart Syndrome. It is real. If traumatic enough may cause death. The tricky thing is it can happen even if we have no history of any heart diseases or clogged arteries.

Signs and symptoms are chest pain, shortness of breath, it may even cause abnormal heartbeats. In case of an extremely emotional event, high stress hormones can cause heart failure.

Romantic relationships are the most common cause of heart breaks but heartaches may happen between platonic and familial relationships also.

Like most mental, emotional and physical situations, we may not be aware anything is even going on. Signs we may be experiencing symptoms of a broken heart are abnormally high stress levels, headaches, upset stomach, more frequent colds, lack of self control, grief and fatigue.

As aforementioned, heart breaks are not only in romantic relationships. You don’t have to be the oldest person in the world to experience heart breaks. Some of us may have to seek professional help to overcome the results of our heart breaks.

There are plenty of songs, poetry and even speeches, begging even pleading for everyone to stop breaking hearts. I’m not going to ask that today. I will ask that we all do what we have to do to prevent ourselves from going through another heartache. Become more aware of the people, places and things around us. Accept what is not good for us by chasing everything that is great for us!

I started to share a fictional story I came up with based on my real life. Instead, I’ve decided to pinpoint lessons learned from the heartaches I’ve experienced.

Adding Cushion to the Fall

Somethings in life are inevitable. No matter what you do, there are some things in life you can’t do to avoid the possibility of a heartache. The ones I can think of off the top of my head are death and great disappointments. For the deaths, knowing that the ones who has passed on are in a better place brings me comfort. Attempting to spend as much time with them as I can and say everything I feel is necessary to say allows me to let them go with no regrets. Great disappointments could be a situation or a person you have high expectations for. Everyday is a chance to fight for everything we are passionate or compassionate about. When it comes to people at times we have to take some disappointments as a loss and find something else to do.

Ways to Avoid Heartaches I have listed ideas and familiar quotes to assist with avoiding your heart from being broken.

  1. Don’t get caught in fantasy thinking. Believe only half of what you see and none of what you hear. Sometimes people tell us what they think we want to hear instead of what we need to hear. The Power of Discernment helps with this situation.
  2. Silence is Golden. The more they talk, the more they’ll tell.
  3. Expectations are the Motherboard for all Disappointments.
  4. Let go of all earthly attachments to people and things. Enjoy everything but understand this is not any of our final destination. Categorize everything as Reasons, Seasons and Lifetimes and act accordingly.
  5. When you fall in love, enjoy it for the moment but always get up and move on. The concept of “falling” throws us off balance, independence turns into dependency that turns into co-dependency and that can put a heavy strain on a relationship. The whole objective is to “be in love,” enjoy it! Or just love for the sake of love being love.
  6. Stop thinking with your heart. It is the central location to our circulatory system. It doesn’t have brain cells for a reason. Logical reasoning, which takes our brains in order to obtain, saves a lot of time and trouble.

Overcoming Future Heartaches I have learned some philosophies that I live by now to avoid experiencing a heartaches.

  1. In any situation, I have to maintain the responsibility of my own feelings.
  2. Never walk into any situation blindsided (Know the specifics and consciously decided if you want to deal with it)
  3. Don’t be so free with yourself, your feelings and most importantly your heart. Take your time with getting to know someone and allowing them to get to know you.
  4. Always be prepared for anything.
  5. Never move forward without having a clear, concise understanding when involving others.
  6. Enjoy everything that comes, seize the moments and remember nothing lasts always.
  7. Always be ready and willing to do what is best for you!

Growing up, I have endured countless heartaches and heart breaks. 1. I was dead set on my parents being happily together. 2. I had a vision of how me and my “friends” would all be close even as we grew older. 3. I wanted each family member to play the part God made them in my life and not overstep their bounds. 4. I wanted to find the love of my life, get married and have kids. (In that order) 5. I wanted my life and everything in it to be “perfect.” 6. Didn’t know there were people I shouldn’t trust until they took advantage of my trust. (Just to name a few)

Each time I can remember thinking the one I was experiencing was the worst and nothing else could top it. Through overcoming familial and platonic heartaches, I won’t allow anything to get close enough to break my heart romantically. It took going through the different heartaches and heart breaks to show just how strong I really am, how resilient my heart is. No matter if anyone had the intent on hurting me or not, I choose to be careful with everyone’s heart because I know how it feels when it is broken. I use my experiences to prevent anyone from going through what I had to in order to learn what I know now. I want to save you the time and trouble!

No matter what my topics or stories are about, just know I have your best interest at heart! Thank you for dropping by! Until next time….Keep Shining and Take Care!!

Yours Truly

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